Will I Sing Hallelujah? Will I Be Able to Speak at All?

This past week a long-time friend of our family passed away. I’d known him since I was six, he was one of the elders of our church in Pico Rivera. He had a laugh that made you want to laugh with him. He loved his family (including his five grandchildren) and he loved God.

It made me reflect on the people from our church in Pico Rivera. Many of the older adults I knew as a child have passed away. They were such a large part of growing up (I was there until I graduated high school) and now I have to wait until heaven to see them again.

I believe strongly in an afterlife, as a Christian I know that heaven is real, but I never feel it more strongly than when someone has passed away. Life pretty much a series of awfulness and, if this is all there is, I want a refund. Sure, life can have amazing parts, but mostly it’s awful. There’s part of me that knows there’s more than this and that part keeps me from jumping off the deep end at any given moment.

When Wednesday comes, and we lay his body in the ground, I’ll be sad. Sad that I can’t see my friend. Sad that his family is hurting. Sad that it’s a reminder that time has passed and eventually everyone I love will join him. But, despite the tears, I have hope. Hope in a world where there’s no more pain, no more tears, no more suffering. In an eternity where I can get to know my Grandpa Louie (who died when I was a toddler). There’s a day when I’ll get to sit with my Grandma Evelyn again and see her watch the birds. Someday there’ll be a place to sit and see my Grandma Shirley sing in the choir and her beautiful voice will fill the room. A place to see my friend Kandice and Jennie from college laughing again.

I can only imagine.

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  1. Jon Johnson
    Posted September 16, 2013 at 1:32 am | Permalink

    Thank you. I don’t know exactly why, but this brought me a bit of calmness. I found out about 3 hours ago that my mom has breast cancer. We don’t know to what extent yet and I’m trying not to borrow trouble, but the worm of worry just keeps working through my mind. I know worry doesn’t help, all I can do is pray an have faith and your words helped with that. So, thank you.

    Jon (a.k.a. pwrquad)

    • Tabz
      Posted September 20, 2013 at 1:57 am | Permalink

      Awhhhh HUGS! I’m so sorry you have to go through that pain, I’m glad I could help a little.

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