I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I want to break all the madness
But it’s all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

Yeah, who I am.
- Nick Jonas and the Administration

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I’ve never been someone who hungered for extreme greatness. Which is interesting to me because I’ve always loved being in the spotlight, being talked about, being whatever. But I have a realistic love for the middle celebrity.

Would I say no if they did happen? Of course not. But I don’t find myself going “you know what. Doing an audio drama isn’t enough. I MUST BE ON TV.”

Is that weird?

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The Show
- Lenka

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze, and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go
Can’t do it alone
I’ve tried, but i don’t know why

Slow it down, make it stop
Or else my heart is going to pop
Cause its to much, yea its alot
To be something I’m not

I’m a fool, out of love
Cause I just can’t get enough

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze, and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go
Can’t do it alone
I’ve tride, but i don’t know why

I’m just a little girl lost in the moment
I’m so scared but i don’t show it
I can’t figure it out
It’s bringing me down
I know, I’ve got to let it go

And just enjoy the show

The sun is hot in the sky
Just like a giant spot light
The people follow the signs
And sicronise in time

It’s just, no body knows
They got to take it to the show
Yea

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze, and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go
Can’t do it alone
I’ve tried, but i don’t know why

I’m just a little girl lost in the moment
I’m so scared but i don’t show it
I can’t figure it out
It’s bringing me down
I know, I’ve got to let it go

And just enjoy the show

Just engoy the show
I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze, and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go
Can’t do it alone
I’ve tride, but i don’t know why

I’m just a little girl lost in the moment
I’m so scared but i don’t show it
I can’t figure it out
It’s bringing me down
I know, I’ve got to let it go

And just enjoy the show

Just enjoy the show(x2)

I want my money back(x3)

Just enjoy the show

I want my money back(x3)

Just enjoy the show

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This song just stopped me in my tracks today….

Better as a Memory – Kenny Chesney

Move on like a sinner’s prayer
let go like a levee breaks
walk away as if i don’t care
learn to shoulder my mistakes
i’m built to fade like your favorite song
I get reckless when there’s no need
laugh as your stories ramble on
break my heart but it won’t bleed
my only friends are pirates, it’s just who i am
i’m better as a memory than as your man

cause good-bye’s are like a roulette wheel
you never know where they’re gonna land
first you’re spinning, then you’re standing still
left holding a losing hand
one day you’re gonna find someone
right away, you’ll know it’s true
that all of your seeking’s done
was just a part of the passing through
right there in that moment
you’ll finally understand
that i was better as a memory than as your man
better as a memory than as your man

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The music video here.

Thou shalt not steal if there is direct victim.
Thou shalt not worship pop idols or follow lost prophets.
Thou shalt not take the names of Johnny Cash, Joe Strummer, Johnny Hartman, Desmond Decker, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix or Syd Barret in vain.
Thou shalt not think any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a paedophile – Some people are just nice.
Thou shalt not read NME.
Thall shalt not stop likin’ a band just ’cause they’ve b’come popular.
Thou shalt not question Stephen Fry.
Thou shalt not judge a book by its cover.
Thou shalt not judge Lethal Weapon by Danny Glover.
Thall shalt not buy Coca-Cola products. Thou shalt not buy Nestle products.
Thou shalt not go into the woods with your boyfriend’s best friend, take drugs and cheat on him.
Thou shalt not fall in love so easily.
Thou shalt not use poetry, art or music to get into girls’ pants – Use it to get into their heads.
Thou shalt not watch Hollyoaks.
Thou shalt not attend an open mic and leave as soon as you done your shitty little poem or song you self-righteous prick.
Thou shalt not return to the same club or bar week in, week out just ’cause you once saw a girl there that you fancied but you’re never gonna fucking talk to.

Thou shalt not put musicians and recording artists on ridiculous pedestals no matter how great they are or were.
The Beatles – Were just a band.
Led Zepplin – Just a band.
The Beach Boys – Just a band.
The Sex Pistols – Just a band.
The Clash – Just a band.
Crass – Just a band.
Minor Threat – Just a band.
The Cure – Were just a band.
The Smiths – Just a band.
Nirvana – Just a band.
The Pixies – Just a band.
Oasis – Just a band.
Radiohead – They’re just a band.
Bloc Party – Just a band.
The Arctic Monkeys – Just a band.
The Next Big Thing – JUST A BAND.

Thou shalt give equal worth to tragedies that occur in non-english speaking countries as to those that occur in english speaking countries.
Thou shalt remember that guns, bitches and bling were never part of the four elements and never will be.
Thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music, thou shalt not make repetitive generic music.
Thou shalt not pimp my ride.
Thou shalt not scream if you wanna go faster.
Thou shalt not move to the sound of the wickedness.
Thou shalt not make some noise for Detroit.
When I say “Hey” thou shalt not say “Ho”.
When I say “Hip” thou shalt not say “Hop”.
When I say, he say, she say, we say, make some noise – kill me.

[Ah, forgot where I was, hang on]

Thou shalt not quote me happy.
Thou shalt not shake it like a polaroid picture.
Thou shalt not wish you girlfriend was a freak like me.
Thou shalt spell the word “Pheonix” P-H-E-O-N-I-X not P-H-O-E-N-I-X, regardless of what the Oxford English Dictionary tells you.
Thou shalt not express your shock at the fact that Sharon got off with Brad at the club last night by saying “Is it.”
Thou shalt think for yourselves.

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Tell me what’s wrong with society
When everywhere I look I see
Young girls dying to be on TV
They won’t stop ’till they reach their dreams
Diet pills, surgery
Photoshop pictures in magazines
Telling them how they should be
It doesn’t make sense to me

Is everybody going crazy
Is anybody gonna save me
Can anybody tell me what’s goin’ on
Tell me what’s goin’ on
If you open your eyes
You’ll see that somethin’ is wrong

I guess things are not how they used to be
There’s no more normal families
Parents act like enemies
Makin’ kids feel like it’s World War III
No one cares, no one’s there
I guess we’re all just too damn busy
And money’s our first priority
It doesn’t make sense to me

Is everybody going crazy
Is anybody gonna save me
Can anybody tell me what’s goin on
Tell me what’s goin’ on
If you open your eyes
You’ll see that somethin’is wrong

Is everybody goin’ crazy?
Is everybody goin’ crazy?

Tell me what’s wrong with society
When everywhere I look I see,
Rich guys driving big SUV’s
While kids are starving in the streets

No one cares
No one likes to share
I guess life’s unfair

Is everybody going crazy
Is anybody gonna save me
Can anybody tell me what’s goin on
Tell me what’s goin’ on
If you open your eyes
You’ll see that somethin’
Somethin’ is wrong

Is everybody going crazy
Can anybody tell me what’s goin on
Tell me what’s goin on
If you open your eyes
You’ll see that somethin’ is wrong

Simple Plan “Crazy”

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So I went shopping for a top today for my halloween costume. Lets just say I hate clothes shopping and leave it at that..

To add insult to injury I got a carmal apple cider at Starbucks and, while walking to work, spilled the darn thing on my shirt.

I like to think I’m more sophisticated than I actually am. In truth, I’m pretty lazy. I perfer working on my mind than anything else. Stains on your tshirt kind of remind you that you’re not all that hot.

Reminds me of Andrew Peterson’s song:

Isn’t It Love

by Andrew Peterson

Lost my luggage in Kalamazoo
Same way I tend to lose my conscience too
Another day in these dirty old blues
And I don’t seem to mind
This is a thing that confounds me
You can find me; You surround and remind me
I lose my way and I forget about You
But You still remember me

Isn’t it love
This rain that falls on the sinner and the saint
Isn’t it love
This well that won’t run dry
Isn’t it love
These mercies are made new every morning

And when I think about that prodigal son
I’ve got to smile when I see the old man run
And I know that You love us the same
‘Cause the sun came up today
Just as if we deserved it
Just as if every one of us fools was worth it
Truth is that we’ll never be perfect
But You love us just the same

Isn’t it love to look down from the sky
And see Your only Son on the cross asking why
And somehow let Him die that way
And not call the whole thing off
All for a man here in Kalamazoo
Who loses his bags and his way sometimes, too
But that was something that You already knew
And still You died for me

©2001 New Spring Publishing, Inc./ASCAP

As Andrew Peterson once said, “sometimes I get more of my theology from music than I do from books.” I find that true again and again in my own life. A good song often leaves me in tears about my spiritual life, more than a speaker or a sermon. I guess that’s why I want to go into media ministry. To me a good concert, a good visual, a good poem, a good song, a good photo will stir me, bring me closer to God, closer to my own sinful condition more than anything else.

So here I am at work, I was supposed to be doing homework. I couldn’t get anywhere on it. Thanfully I have time.

Isn’t this love? God’s so amazing.

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